By: Mairi Collins

From a baby’s first cry to a request to pass the salt, we communicate out of necessity. We need something, and so we ask for it, in one way or another. Necessity is certainly a driving force behind the impulse to communicate, and one that is universally recognized. However, research is beginning to show that humans communicate not because we have to, but because we want to.

Extensive research has been conducted on how we communicate, through which channels and what we communicate about. However, there is much less information out there as to why we communicate. For this reason, Mikael Jensen, senior researcher at the University of Gothenburg, Sweden, conducted a study in 2018 to assess reasons for interpersonal communication from the perspective of people from diverse backgrounds. His study published in the Central European Journal of Communication asked why humans choose to engage in interpersonal communication and which reasons are most important.

Jensen gathered 313 students who were enlisted in international courses across two universities in Sweden and who represented more than ten different cultures. The participants filled out a voluntary questionnaire where they rank-ordered reasons to interpersonally communicate. This questionnaire was based around 17 statements about communication, such as “the purpose of communication is to affect and influence others,” “the purpose of communication is to express emotions” and “the purpose of communication is to keep others calm and satisfied.” The study concluded with statistical analysis of the outcomes.

Findings of this study show that there are two cases that stood out significantly across all cultures and were tied for the number one and two reasons for why participants communicated interpersonally: “to share and increase enjoyment” and “to create and strengthen social bonds.” This shows us that top reasons for why we communicate are to manage relationships, which makes sense, of course, but also to live, laugh and love, as they say. Besides being necessary for survival, communicating with each other is fun! The wording of the top statement suggests that we communicate to express emotions in the general sense, but to experience specifically positive ones.

Humans seek out joy in conversation and use interpersonal connection to experience enjoyment. Resolving conflict, gaining information and cooperating with each other are all reasons to communicate, of course, but the findings of this study point to the conclusion that the principal and most fulfilling reason to engage in interpersonal communication is simply for the pleasure of enjoying each other’s company.

So…relax. Spread the love around! See what happens when a wave to the mail carrier, coffee with a friend, or a signal in traffic becomes a purposeful act of communication and connection instead of merely a societally necessitated one.

The number one reason we communicate? Surprisingly, perhaps, evolution isn’t the main determinant of human communication after all. Turns out, we all actually like each other a lot!